Sunday, February 8, 2009

Supposably there was this episode of Friends

Supposably there was this episode of Friends all about supposably vs. supposedly. Thanks to Keith Rand for reminding me about this one. This is right up there with irregardless and acrost.

What you say? Acrost? New words are here!

Supposably - "Alex, I'll take "Wurds that just r-unt" for $200". Now why take a perfectly normal word, and word that means simply presumed to be true or real without conclusive evidence, and change it from supposedly to supposably. Would you change probably to probebly or probedly? I think "prolly" not (see earlier post). Maybe you think you're "able" to do whatever you want with the English language so you can just tack "ably" on to whatever words might sound mellifluous? After a second look, it turns out that supposably actually IS a word, a real one, weird huh. It just can't be used instead of supposedly, which is precisely what most people do, so on the list it stays!

Acrost.
"uh-crah-st' - You can go "across" the street for lunch. You can "cross" the road. You can go to abc.com and watch "Lost", which will "cost" you nothing. You cannot however, go "acrost" anywhere. Why some persons have begun adding a "T" where none belongs or has ever occurred is beyond me, but there it is, right at the end of across, a "T", so sad.

Irrecyclable - A friend of mine tried to say that Jews and Gentiles were once "irreconcilable". Unbeknownst to him his brain was using 20% post consumer product and it came out irrecyclable. Like, the Jews and Gentiles can't recycle together? He stopped himself and said "that's not right" but being unable to grasp the right word, soldiered on without using irreconcilable. Oh how I would like to go back in time and cry out "Its not right! The Jews and Gentiles CAN recycle together! One bottle at a time!".

Revelations - Book 67 in the Bible, also known as Revelations. Revelation is the last book in the Bible (number 66). There is no book after this, no smaller version of Revelation. For some reason, persons not listed here, like to refer to this mystery work, often in a sentence such as "So I was reading in Revelations the other day and.....". You can have a revelation, you can even have revelations, but you have not and never will read from a book in the Bible called "Revelations".

Struck Out To Me - At what point in human society did striking out and things that stick out become struck out I'll never know. Apparently people are putting struck out and stuck out together and coming up with "struck out to me", like having an epiphany, but without say, using a correct word like epiphany to describe it. Example - "This point in the book really struck out to me." At which point I like to grab an imaginary bat and begin swinging away making swishing noises.

Buhdellium - Bdellium (dĕl'ē-əm) (Hebrew bedolach) is an aromatic gum like myrrh that is exuded from a tree. THE "B" IS SILENT PEOPLE, SILENT! There is no "buh" in Bdellium, its just dellium! See also, Salvuh (Salve with a giant "uh" at the end) in an earlier post.

Wroughted - wrought, past and past participle of work, \ˈrȯt\ - It's past tense, you can't just add "ed" willy nilly wherever you like because you don't "unnerstan" (see previous post) the tense of a word. There is no wroughted, there is no wroughted iron, you can't have wroughted some work.
1. Archaic except in some senses. a pt. and pp. of work.
–adjective
2. worked.
3. elaborated; embellished.
4. not rough or crude.
5. produced or shaped by beating with a hammer, as iron or silver articles.

Gotten - This has always seemed odd to me. I've gotten a blog vs. I've got a blog. I'll not delve into this myself as this site does a good job for me - Note "AmE" and "BrE" are short for American English and British English - http://www-personal.umich.edu/~jlawler/aue/gotten.html

Towards - This last one is not something that is not mispronounced but bugs me anyways, call me a word snob, I can take it. The word "towards". I hear everyone pronounce this as (tôrdz, tōrdz, tə-wôrdz'). Which is correct, but it just sounds soo wrong! I mean, its really "to" plus "wards", right? So shouldn't it be "too-wards"? But its not, its just tordz, which doesn't even sound like a real word, it sounds like a mispronounced word, try it, do it, say it out loud, loudly, TORDZ. Yeah right, its a word, uh huh, sure. Now turn your back TORDZ me.

Wednesday, February 4, 2009

Mispronunciations That Vix Us

Warning, I use a lot of unnecessary quotations in this post for "sole" purpose of increasing your level of comprehension of mispronounced words. I in no way, shape, or form condone rampant quotation "marks", anywhere.

Interesting – sometimes referred to as “innersting”, and often “inneresting” pronounced “inner-es-sting” but sadly, not like it is supposed to be “inter-es-sting”.

Understand – Unfortunately, some people don’t…..how to speak that is. Due to pure laziness, persons to remain unnamed choose to leave out important syllables and pronounce this words “unnerstand”. If you want to get you’re redneck on, try leaving off the last letter, as some are prone to, and just say “I just don’t unnerstan.” This could get really confusing if you were for instance, trying to describe something that was under a guy named Stan. “I just don’t unnerstan what’s under Stan?”. For emphasis, tack a long drawn out “shoot” on the end, pronounced “shoouit”.

Actually – sometimes mispronounced as “act tuh lee” instead of “actchoolee”, generally attributed to non-native English speakers.

Insidious – sometimes mispronounced like “deciduous” instead of “in-sid-dee-us”. While we can see where such a mistake would be made, we cannot condone the use of words one does not know the correct pronunciation of. Pronunciation: in-'si-dE-&s
Function: adjective
Etymology: Latin insidiosus, from insidiae ambush, from insidEre to sit in, sit on, from in- + sedEre to sit -- more at SIT
1 a : awaiting a chance to entrap : TREACHEROUS b : harmful but enticing : SEDUCTIVE
2 a : having a gradual and cumulative effect : SUBTLE b of a disease : developing so gradually as to be well established before becoming apparent

Soften – correct pronunciation is “soffen”. Most annoyingly, some persons insert a hard “T” to make it “soft-Ten”, with two “t’s”, grrrrrrrr.

Salve – Pronounced “sav” with a silent “L” most people sadly hold onto the “L” and pronounce this word “salve-uh”. Pronunciation: 'sav, 'säv, 'salv, 'sälv
Function: noun
Etymology: Middle English, from Old English sealf; akin to Old High German salba salve, Greek olpE oil flask
1 : an unctuous adhesive substance for application to wounds or sores
2 : a remedial or soothing influence or agency

Degradation – Sometimes mispronounced “degration”, as in, “there’s a degration of the English language going on and nobody notices”.

Comfterble (cum-fer-tble)
Usage: Jeans that were comfterble before Thanksgiving are not quite so comfterble afterwards. Sweat pants are the comfterble choice for apres-Thanksgiving raiment.

Tangentally (tang-gent-tallee) – Tangentially is a word, meaning closely related; tangentally is just wrong. Pronunciation: tan-'jen(t)-sh&l
Function: adjective
1 : of, relating to, or of the nature of a tangent
2 : acting along or lying in a tangent

Anointment – “Anointing” plus “Ointment” does apparently make “anointment”. Previously thought to be a conjunction of two words making a new but not real third word, research has revealed that anointment is indeed a word:

Pronunciation: &-'noint
Function: transitive verb
Etymology: Middle English, from Anglo-French enoint, past participle of enoindre, from Latin inunguere, from in- + unguere to smear -- more at OINTMENT
1 : to smear or rub with oil or an oily substance
2 a : to apply oil to as a sacred rite especially for consecration b : to choose by or as if by divine election; also : to designate as if by a ritual anointment

Probably – This word is so often butchered its spawn could almost be put in the new word category. We’ve heard “prolly” and more often “probly”, as in, the problem is probly that your parents didn’t read with you when you were young. Three syllables people, one, two, three, prob-bub-lee.

Well – I can’t be certain that anyone acktahlee uses the word anymore, since I started this list I’ve noticed its almost complete extinction. “Well”, a versatile word, pronounced only one way. Example: “The water well on my property produces 100 gallons a day.” Mostly, this is used as a conjunction of thought, such as “well, I’m not sure your assumption is correct.” Unfortunately, this word has been debased and as far as I can tell, is pronounced “whull” 99.9% of the time now. Listen, you will hear it everywhere.

We’re – See previous, what was once “wee-ur” is now simply “wur”.

For – More likely to be attributed to regional accent, but also produced via laziness, “for” becomes “fer” much, much too often.

Your/You’re – As with the previous three, the debauchery of the simple word continues. This gets shortened to the very aristocratic “yur”. “Yur intellect is astounding and leaves me completely obsoleted (see previous post of definition of obsoleted).”

The Multi-Slur – The multi-slur is when you take a bunch of words, and, being too lazy or uneducated to actually speak the English language, you just slur them altogether. Most prevalent in this category are phrases starting with the word “all”. Allzyaneed, Allzyagot, Allzweiz, Allzyouiz. Why people can’t simply say “All you need” instead of “allzyaneed” is beyond me.

Guh – Why just pronounce a “g” when you can make a “guh” sound and add an entire syllable to a word?! Beinguh, seeinguh, tryinguh, the list is endless, irksome to no end.

Ex-specially – Especially is a word, a word that does not have a “x” in it, anywhere, in any form. Nor is “ex-specially” something that used to be special.

Youst - Used is a common word. I used to own a big car, I used to know Spanish, I used to be able to pronounce used (yuzd) correctly but now just say youst instead because everyone else is and I like to be the same, like I youst to be.

Wurds that just R-unt

I like words, language, slang, high-falutin, all of it. I've been told I have a proclivity towards the verbose.

A few years ago I started writing down peculiar things people around me were saying. The list has grown and I've asked a few close friends and family to contribute. Unfortunately, most of the time, they say something like "I heard this great word!" and tell me about it, but it never gets written down. Hence this Blog, that will immortalize these mangled verbal creations for all time. Let us begin with words that aren't really words, and hence the title of this blog.

Reprieval [Reprieve - Pronunciation: ri-'prEv - Function: transitive verb]

Simply not a word, you can get or need a reprieve from something, but not a reprieval.

Reprieve: 1 : to delay the punishment of (as a condemned prisoner) 2 : to give relief or deliverance to for a time.

Epicity [Epicenter – Pronunciation: 'e-pi-"sen-t&r Function: noun ]

Derived from epicenter, meaning the center of something, not an actual word.

Epicenter: 1 : the part of the earth's surface directly above the focus of an earthquake.

Irregardless [Regardless – Pronunciation: ri-'gärd-l&s Function: adjective]

Regardless, often confused with “irregardless”, which, “irregardless” of what people think, is not a word.

Brustleing (bus'el)--v.i. [NOT]: 1. A windy day. i.e. "It's brustleing outside."

Aka: Blustery or Blustering.--v.i. 1. To blow gustily and with violence and noise, as the wind.

Merlino Wool (mur'lin'o) (wool)--n. 1. [NOT]: Wool produced by a famous wizard. Aka: Merino Wool--n. Wool spun from the sheep from a specific region of Italy.

Tsunami Oranges (tsoo`na'me) (or`inj)--n. [NOT]: 1. Oranges found in the aftermath of an extensive and often very destructive ocean wave caused by a sub-marine earthquake. Aka: Satsuma Oranges--n. 1. Oranges from a former province of southern Kyushu Island, Japan.

Acrost – as in, that dog just ran “acrost” the street. This ones just pure lazinesss.

Strategery – As opposed to strategy

Newkyalur – A small village in Iceland, not a form of atomic energy

Incomplete Amazement – In lieu of being “in complete amazement” one can always find themselves experiencing “incomplete amazement” where your almost amazed, but not completely

Underlining [Underline - Pronunciation: '&n-d&r-"lIn, "&n-d&r-'Function: transitive verb]

Usage: The underlining cause of the degration of words is laziness. You can line something, you can underline something, but there is no such thing as underlining. Often used with the following terms [the underlining (cause, issue, affect, effect, etc.)] Although there can be underlining, say in a book.

Overlying [Overlie - Pronunciation: -'lI Function: transitive verb]
Usage: The overlying cause of nonsensical words is a disability of vocabulary. See previous.

Overlie:

1 : to lie over or upon
2 : to cause the death of by lying upon

Obsoleted – Obsolete is both present and past tense, there is no obsoleted.

Usage: That software was completely obsoleted by the latest release. Pronunciation: "äb-s&-'lEt, 'äb-s&-"
Function: adjective
Etymology: Latin obsoletus, from past participle of obsolescere to grow old, become disused, perhaps from ob- toward + solEre to be accustomed
1 a : no longer in use or no longer useful obsolete word> b : of a kind or style no longer current : OLD-FASHIONED obsolete technology>

Scopacetic – slang, scope + copacetic, indicating that the scope (of work) is copacetic (satisfactory or acceptable)

Variant(s): also co·pa·set·ic or co·pe·set·ic /"kO-p&-'se-tik/
Function: adjective
Etymology: origin unknown
: very satisfactory

Indepthly – You can talk about something in-depth, but you can’t discuss something “more indepthly”, unless perhaps, the discussion is about the English language, and you’re clearly out of your depth.

It’s a Numetter – A numetter (number + letter) is when people say something like “As you can see, Number “A” is the most important” when referring to a list. People will also say “Letter 1”. The letter “A” is not a number! And the number 1 is not a letter! Another thing I despise, which is related, is when people start off a discourse with “First of all…………” and then go to “Secondly…”. Or “Firstly……….” Then switch to “Second of all.” Dah!

Dark Matter – Instead of gray matter. Referring to one’s brain, occasionally, when one’s gray matter becomes, shall we say, more clouded by the worries of this age, one might accidentally refer to it as dark matter.

Escalade – Escalade is a car, a big ugly gas guzzling behemoth. The problem is that kids are now using this word in lieu of escalate, and don’t even know it. They might say something like “the argument escaladed until we were both yelling”. This has been documented in freshmen college writing assignments, disturbing.