The train of events clearly shows that we do not meet mustard

The Proof is the Pudding (Contributed by S.H.)

This phrase dates back at least to the 1600’s with perhaps the most famous usage coming via Cervantes in Don Quixote. Most sources quote the following "the proof of the pudding is in the eating." Meaning that the true value or quality of something can only be judged when it's put to use. The meaning is often summed up as "results are what count." While over time this has come to be abbreviated to “the proof is in the pudding” or simply “the proof in pudding” (retaining the original meaning), I can find no reference to the term “the proof is the pudding.” This phrase does not retain the same meaning as the original. It seems to imply rather that the result is the proof. Of course, if that’s what you wanted to say then don’t bastardize the age old saying just say the proof is the result. Knowing this co-worker, they were trying to say it correctly and just had a synaptical short, something of a regular occurrence for them.

Prounce

A horse can prance. A cat can pounce. The former neighbor of my sister Anna was always telling her that her dog Lucy was “such a prouncer.” You think that’s bad? Wait until you read about unquenchionable. People and their made up words, making this blog possible, thank you people. I guess I am prone to prounce on the misspoken word, omagosh I’m such a prouncer!

Spelt

Not only did you spell it wrong but you pronounced spell wrong, as in “dear you spelt that word wrong.” Spelt sounds like a small fish good only for bait, e.g., “when we chum the water with spelt our catch numbers go waaaaay up. It really nicens up our paycheck.”

Nicen – Not to be confused with the product Nice N’ Easy, or the Nicene Creed, I can only find a definition of this word on the very authoritative Wiktionary (note saracasm) as to become or make nicer and used in the phrase “nicen up”. Let me try this for a minute. “Wow, those rims really nicen up your ride.” “Lemme just run inside and nicen up before we bounce.” “I only wish that my charity would lead to the ongoing nicening of America.” Nope, that’s not working for me.

Unquenchionable

I heard this on the radio on the way to work the other day which caused my head to tilt slightly to the side and upward, a single eyebrow raised, as I pondered the potential etymology of this word. Un-quench-tionable…………hmnnnn……something that cannot be quenched…………..something that cannot be questioned………….something that…..this guy on the radio just made up. It had something to do with George Steinbrenner and his love or desire for the game. I tried to make it work in a sentence, I failed. (See also my mad MS Paint skillz)

Train of Events (Contributed by S.H.)

Choo choo! The event trains comin’ baby! We are all familiar with the phrase “chain of events”, a number of actions and their effects that are contiguous and linked together. But train of events I’ve never heard of before. Lets try to make this work. Train of Events: A series of events that are linked together and travel together on a defined path with a predictable origin and destination. This train may be used to flummox high school math students when used in conjunction with another train of events traveling from the opposite direction at a different speed with a different start time.” The guy that uttered this phrase sits in an office next to the woman who has been immortalized on this blog with the use of “fasterness” and the communistic trifecta (see older posts). Maybe they are rubbing off on each other?

Meet Mustard

This is funny without clarification because the use of mustard with “meet” makes you think of a hotdog or hamburger. The originator however did not have this in mind. This person said that we need to make sure our work “meets mustard”. Muster, it’s muster, not mustard. Muster means to assemble or summon (troops, etc.), as for inspection, roll call, or service. So they meant to say that our work needs to meet a certain standard upon inspection. What they said was our work needs to meet mustard, a condiment.

Perscribe (Contributed by G.K.)

I left this last for a reason, but first, my take. You can prescribe something, mostly commonly medication. You cannot perscribe anything. You’re free to perspire while being a scribe even (see photo of scribe in hoodie), but you shan’t perscribe. When this was brought to my attention by a co-worker the following conversation took place consisting entirely of blog related terminology.

Co-worker: perscribe? how does one perscribe something....

Me: the proof is the pudding my friend

Co-worker: whoa, all that in the kitchen sink?

Me: It's unquenchionable

Me: a train of events you cannot deny

Co-worker: good thing he's just an acquaintenance